Love Bites, Life stage, the game?

nocturne · Post by **nocturne** » Thu May 29, 2008 3:56 am

Hi all

So i noticed that i own a game? called love bites. I'm not reviewing but just mentioning. Does anyone else have this cd? I got mine from a collection i bought years ago and thought i'd test it last night. It seems to just be cheap nasty FMV of hookers dressed as vampires. Anyone left this one on long enough to see if theres actually a game?

Ok, Next up is lifestage. Whats the deal with this oddball? I booted it up, walked into a house extremely slowly and basically turned the 3do off. Was my impatience called for? or is there actually a game here

Vance · Post by **Vance** » Thu May 29, 2008 4:37 am

Love Bites is another one of those stupid adult titles, the only one of which that involves some kind of gameplay (that I know of) being Neurodancer. I reviewed Sex, which really was just pixellated, tame footage of woman moving around in what was presumably an erotic fashion.

It wasn't, but I didn't share that particular spoiler with you.

Honestly, it seemed to be culled from some kind of soft porn footage, or hatchet-edited hardcore, with some minor attempt at having a narrative (every clip started with a voice over that had nothing to do with anything else). It was basically shallow wank material for kids whose parents didn't pay attention to their game shelf.

Life Stages was some kind of... you know, I'm not sure. Was it a home builder? Or was it another damp fart of an edutainment title? I never personally suffered through a copy of that. I'm almost definite that it's not a game, though.

Lemmi · Post by **Lemmi** » Thu May 29, 2008 5:32 am

Vance wrote:Love Bites is another one of those stupid adult titles, the only one of which that involves some kind of gameplay (that I know of) being Neurodancer. I reviewed Sex, which really was just pixellated, tame footage of woman moving around in what was presumably an erotic fashion.

Honestly, it seemed to be culled from some kind of soft porn footage, or hatchet-edited hardcore, with some minor attempt at having a narrative (every clip started with a voice over that had nothing to do with anything else). It was basically shallow wank material for kids whose parents didn't pay attention to their game shelf.
.

they are all hatchet-edited from hardcore porn movies (except i think supermodels go wild), i know i have the Blond Justice and Sex original movies, i had to download those to see what i was missing

the only game type is Neurodancer and Mind Teazzer (i havent played this one but i think its a picture puzzle type game with dirty pictures)

Life Stages was some kind of... you know, I'm not sure. Was it a home builder? Or was it another damp fart of an edutainment title? I never personally suffered through a copy of that. I'm almost definite that it's not a game, though.

not a game like a shooter but you decorate your home with all sorts of stuff, i played for 30 min one day and almost fell asleep during one of the revolving loading zones
i think 3dokid liked it tho

might want to check out his blog to see what his review was
http://fz1-3do.blog.co.uk/?tag=virtual- ... life-stage.

Post by **3DOKid** » Thu May 29, 2008 7:35 am

Mind Teazer is nasty. Love Bites, Sex, Blond Justice, Penthouse camera shoot, are, if I'm honest, boring.

That virtual House thing is pretty cool mind you. It can be a bit slow, but's worth having a play with

Vance · Post by **Vance** » Thu May 29, 2008 9:26 am

It never struck my fancy, back from when I first read about it in the 3DO Now catalog to... pretty much right this moment. I might give it a spin the next time a retro frenzy takes over, but I can't say I have high hopes for it.

Lemmi wrote: i know i have the Blond Justice and Sex original movies, i had to download those to see what i was missing

This is... I think this is fear that I'm feeling. It could be admiration, but it's probably fear.

Post by **3DOKid** » Thu May 29, 2008 12:18 pm

Now -- if they could take the Japanese approach to smutty games (Twinkle knights, Virtual Cameraman, Paper-Scissors-stone) and use the American models from Blond Justice and Love Bites, then it would be unnecessary for me to ever buy another video game. Better still, mix the models up.

Trev · Post by **Trev** » Thu May 29, 2008 4:57 pm

That virtual House thing is pretty cool mind you. It can be a bit slow, but's worth having a play with

A bit slow ... ??? I swear whenever I pop this title into my multiplayer I expect to see some kind of dinosaur like bird start spinning the drive like in the Flinstones.

Of course if I remember right, you have the japanese version. Perhaps it is a bit quicker than NTSC.

nocturne · Post by **nocturne** » Fri May 30, 2008 3:53 am

Wow, you guys really know your games

I'll take a wander around the virtual house when i'm feeling mellow. I have a stack of other weird named titles that i'll try, like N.O.B. which i'll have to comment on.

I predict an entire evening of 3do game testing ahead

Post by **3DOKid** » Fri May 30, 2008 7:03 am

NOB is utterly brilliant, yet utterly crap at the same time.

Sometimes the graphics are breath taking. The guys in suits, the monsters that is, are all kinds of brilliant, but the animation and the actually fighting is really bad. PLus the load times...