Although evilBay is a great substitution for éBay, I was thinking of a more sour take on it personally like:
éBay = replaced by: Flip4Profit.com
Especially entertaining when individuals come by to try and quickly sell their items in the tried and tested:
"Hi all

. Thought these items might be of interest to you guys

. Here is a link to my Flip4Profit.com auctions - as I don't want to sell to you directly, because I want more money than you'll willingly offer for them

. So feel free to bid, and overpay for them instead

. As predicted, I will be aiding my own devices by shilling from an unknown location, out of town, in the few remaining minutes of the auction

. These will definitely be selling for massively unreasonable amounts of money, all thanks to me and Flip4Profit.com

. Thanks in advance... guys

"
Ahem.
What do you think guys? Guys?? Guys?! Guuuuuuuyss!!!